..:: Pieces of Mandy ::..

I don't know why I feel like I'm a slave to the corporate world...it's not like I HAVE to work...I work to ensure that I'm comfortable in my own skin. It's like taking on a responsibility...keeping myself busy...distracted...but from what? Being at home makes me feel idle...makes me feel like I'm not making use of my time properly - I feel uncomfortable in a relaxed slate and yet, I long for it so much when I'm working.

I love to be around people...they make me smile...they let me communicate my thoughts. In a given day, I speak to about 20+ people...whether it be the taxi driver, or the store clerk, the secretary or my roommate....Perhaps that is what work is to me - a place to interact, to socialize...to figure out what my opinions and thoughts are..to figure out what I want.

I wish that I could say I work solely for the purpose of making money - but that would be a lie. Money, to me, is just an object that can be replenished at all times. It is not what drives me...I wish I could say that it was because it would make matters so much easier to deal with..

I need to keep busy...I need to feel like I'm doing something with my life...