Wednesday, July 28, 2004
No Compliments Please... but Thank You!
In my Developmental Psychology class, the prof pointed out today that girls can't really take compliments as well as boys can. He says that it has been shown that girls tend to push the compliment away - either by throwing back a compliment to the complimentor....or just not even acknowledging it as a compliment. It makes us uncomfortable. So he told us to go out and test it. He said that the next time someone pays us a compliment, we should pause for about 2 seconds and just say "Thank you." Simple enough, right? WRONG.
So I tried it. I approached a professor of mine today to ask him if he would consider writing a letter of reference for me for my Masters application to the university. He was honoured that I approached him and went on to tell me what he thought of my work in his class. And I tell you.. I tried to just say "Thank-you, sir." BUT I COULDN'T DO IT! I threw back the compliment by telling him that he has really made a difference with this new program that he's trying to introduce to English students. It wasn't even about kissing ass.... I just couldn't sit there and say nothing!
Try it... see if you can sit by and let someone compliment you without paying a compliment back. It's hard! I think it has to do with the way that we're socialized..girls tend to think that they have to do that because they don't want to come off as conceited or full of themselves. It's almost like saying "I know!" But when guys are given compliments, how come they don't feel obligated to give one back?? What is the difference?? Why do we girls shy away from compliments that are well-deserved!?
Any theories?
So I tried it. I approached a professor of mine today to ask him if he would consider writing a letter of reference for me for my Masters application to the university. He was honoured that I approached him and went on to tell me what he thought of my work in his class. And I tell you.. I tried to just say "Thank-you, sir." BUT I COULDN'T DO IT! I threw back the compliment by telling him that he has really made a difference with this new program that he's trying to introduce to English students. It wasn't even about kissing ass.... I just couldn't sit there and say nothing!
Try it... see if you can sit by and let someone compliment you without paying a compliment back. It's hard! I think it has to do with the way that we're socialized..girls tend to think that they have to do that because they don't want to come off as conceited or full of themselves. It's almost like saying "I know!" But when guys are given compliments, how come they don't feel obligated to give one back?? What is the difference?? Why do we girls shy away from compliments that are well-deserved!?
Any theories?
