..:: Pieces of Mandy ::..

There comes a point in everybody's life where they have to learn how to let go of a friend. Some friendships aren't really meant to be and can only have a ceratin impact on your life. It's harder when this friend has been around for years.

We've all had this experience before...and it is difficult every time. The key is to not harbor hard feelings. People change, lives change and sometimes other issues get in the way - but aside from that, it is about an acceptance of the course of your friendship. I strongly believe that certain people enter your life to teach you lessons - good or bad, they are lessons you could not have learned elsewhere.

A friend of mine is experiencing this loss of friendship and is having a hard time dealing with it. A friend of his is distancing herself from him...and the circumstances are complex. He insists that they were really close and great friends...and I say, perhaps they weren't as great friends as he assumed...because she is willing to give up the friendship to avoid awkward silences. Nonetheless, it's nobody's fault, really... more or less...these incidences aren't uncommon. We have all been in that situation.. and we have all been on both ends of the spectrum.
People move on...and friends are people. We should be grateful for the time spent together all those years instead of the present behaviour and situation. We never know for sure the reasonings of our friends, but they do deserve the benefit of the doubt.

The key to any relationship is understanding and communication. I once told a friend that it's okay if we are moving farther apart - that I understand if we are no longer close friends. We've both grown and moved on. I told her that she will always be a part of my life and if she ever needs anything in this lifetime, I will never hesitate to help her. At first, she was upset...but she understood what I meant after some thought...I still consider her one my greatest friends today...

I recently met with a friend I had stopped talking to for 7 years. We met up and had dinner, talked for 2.5 hours and got caught up. It amazed me that I had forgotten why we had stopped talking in the first place. But what was more amazing was that we could pick up...where we left off...it was easy because we already had a history.

Sometimes letting someone go... without resentment or bad feelings...is the best thing you can do for each other. Who knows... maybe 10 years down the line, you'll find your friendship again. Friendship should never be forced or feel like an obligation...when you give someone the space that they need, they eventually get a chance to see the bigger picture.